Spirituality

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InTheDeepEnd's avatar
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Hello darlings.
I don't know why but I feel the need to write a journal.
I'm not even completely sure why I'm doing this because my life is pretty normal right now.

I just have this need to express my religious values right now?? I know that's not popular in many circles.
It's this feeling I have that I'm being full-like my heart is full. I can't describe it in any way other than...I feel like my personality is being returned to the way I viewed the world as a child. As a child, I was very loving and accepting. I never had enemies because I loved everyone. It's stupid...but not. You'd be surprised how much better you can feel when you feel a presence of love around you...which is exactly what I feel at BYU. Everybody cares about each other here. There's this thing called home teaching where two people come to your house and give you a brief religious teaching and they check in on you. Last night they came over (they do it once a month) and it was the first time I had a home teaching. It was literally exactly what I needed. I had been legitimately crying for a few hours because I felt lonely. I really really really miss my boyfriend and he really really really misses me too and it's been hard for us. I've been second guessing my decision to go here because I miss him that bad- the thing is I know I made the right choice. I know I belong here. I'd be lieing if I said I thought the people here were crazies and I hate them. I really love them. Their culture is so beautiful. It's a culture based on Jesus and really what more could you want? Okay...maybe if they didn't think their church was the only true church. That gets kind of annoying because I'm a bit of a nondenomination Christian. I have a very distinct religious belief that all religions are correct in their own way. Paradoxical? Yeah I know. I'm maybe the crazy one. I don't know. I just really like religion. I really relate to Piscene from Life of Pi. Constantly. That is my life. 

Goodbye darlings.
This has been a bunch of rambling and it's probably incoherent but I'm not editing it because I have to go to bed. 
Okay g'night. 
© 2015 - 2024 InTheDeepEnd
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